BOOKS
Before You Fly Off
It was James Baldwin’s “The Fire Next Time” that initially inspired me to write this book. He’d decided to write an essay welcoming his nephew to adolescence and preparing him for everyday life as a young Black male in America. My daughter had just turned 16 and I wanted to offer a similar gift welcoming her to young womanhood and preparing her for the everyday realities of Black girls and Black women in a country that is still trying to live up to its potential.
What began as a father’s personal attempt to save his troubled teenage daughter from peer pressure and self-destructive habits turned out to be exactly what a guidance counselor needed for her student intervention incentives. “Before You Fly Off” quickly became a grassroots tool for high school teachers, counselors and parents seeking alternative approaches to youth development. ‘The little big book’, as one teen called it, spoke directly to Black girls from a Black father’s perspective at the most crucial period in their lives in a language that was relatable and culturally-sound. As my daughter got older, the topics got more serious including feelings of entitlement, social media addiction, looking good while feeling bad, skin color matters, weight and self-image concerns, taking accountability, single parenting as the new normal and the realities of dating Black men. The point of this book is to introduce our young ladies to the value of reflecting on their choices, so they can understand how these same choices dictate their outcomes.
This conversation is for all our young ladies to gain a strong sense of themselves not because they’re that ‘fine’ but because they feel fine!
Before You Fly Off
Fatherly advice for daughters with and without fathers
Kahlil Koromantee touches on things that parents want to get around to discussing but often fail to because frustrations, anger and disappointments get in the way. With a hint of humor, for the parents trying to build character and integrity in their children, the lessons contained in “Before You Fly Off” are a MUST.” — OOSA Online Book Club
Excerpt:
"What did I ever see in him? But that’s just it. What you were looking for in him was what you were looking for in YOU! This is why it’s very important that you learn how to develop a relationship with yourself first. Because when you put the focus on you, you see love and life from a more empowering place instead of a ‘poor me’ mindset. I’m not trying to tell you to become self-absorbed, just self-reliant.
When you rely on yourself for emotional rescue, you don’t become dependent on a man to make you happy. As a matter of fact, it’s your responsibility to create your happiness. Others can add to it, but it’s not fair for you to expect a boyfriend to do the work of resolving your inner turmoil for you; and that’s what it comes down to. Doing the work. Your work."
These youth motivational books are part of an on-going book series I’ve written for teens and young adults who need help expressing their feelings while coping with everyday challenges that ultimately affect their grades and behavior. They serve as help guides for parents having difficulty relating to their son or daughter and as alternative intervention tools for teachers and counselors who work with hard to reach students.